It is Monday night, and I’m sitting here writing. Sister Verena is reading, and Jennifer and Ryan are playing doll. Jennifer is the mom, and Ryan is the daddy, though I don’t think Ryan has any clue what he is supposed to do. He just follows his big sister around. They are so sweet.
Joe and Susie, Mom and Dad’s neighbors, sent supper over earlier. They sent pizza and flowers. Mose’s brother Alvin and his wife, Susanna, and their two children, Kaleb and Isaiah, showed up with supper, also. So, they just stayed, and we all had subs and pizza for supper. Alvin and Susanna try to come every Monday night, Lord willing.
My sister Verena stays with the children and me now. The children love that she’s here. They like when she gives them rides on her scooter and she makes them go to sleep like that when it’s their nap time. I’m so thankful to have Verena; it helps to have her here, so the nights don’t seem as long and lonely. I keep her awake to share memories about Mose. She’s a good listener. May God bless her generous heart.
My family and Mose’s family have been very supportive. They all helped me in many different ways.
Aunt Verena came here Friday (March 5) for the night. I feel bad for her. She also has some long, lonely nights. I have my children to keep me occupied, but Verena is all by herself now, even though we are with her. Her routine changed, also. She misses her sister Susan dearly, as do the rest of us, but Verena lived with her. When you live with someone, it seems a lot harder. Please keep her in your prayers.
It’s Tuesday afternoon, and I just got done getting the laundry in. It was a beautiful day for laundry. Jennifer and Ryan love to play outside in this weather.
Lovina’s daughter Susan enjoys the spring sunshine for hanging laundry out to dry. (Contributed photo)
Jennifer still comes up to me and asks me if I think Daddy is coming back. Ryan can’t talk except for some baby talk, so he tries to repeat after Jennifer. It breaks my heart that their daddy isn’t here to hug them or be with them any longer. Mose was a great father.
Today is the third month since the accident, and it seems like Mose still should be coming home. It’s hard to grasp yet. When Mose and I first met, I never once thought that our love story would get cut short. It tore me to pieces when they called and said he passed away. It breaks my heart in two every time Jennifer and Ryan say “Daddy.” I fight myself when the bitter thoughts take place, and the days seem to be long and the future so dark. I learned to just take one day at a time.
I thank God for every moment I had with my dear husband. God blessed us with these years together, even though I catch myself wishing that I could have had one more year with Mose. He left the house that morning with both of us not knowing those were our last moments together. Our last “I love you”s, our last hugs, our last everything. If only I would have known, I would never have let him go.
Mose never gained consciousness after the accident. I feel like I lost him the 9th of December already. Losing Mose has made me look at life differently. Life is too short, so don’t take it for granted. Make the best of it while you can. In a blink of an eye, life can change, and it’s devastating. God has carried me a long way, and still does. Keep Dan’s wife, Jodi, in your prayers, also. Her life changed, too. She has a lot of lonely nights. May God be with her.
On Thursday, my mom and sisters Lovina and Loretta, brother Kevin, sister Elizabeth and her children, Aunt Verena, Aunt Emma, and her daughter Emma and children, and cousin Susan and her children, are all coming for the day. All the food is being brought in.
May everyone have a great rest of the week, and God bless.
I will share this sugar cookie recipe. They were a favorite to Mose. He liked them frosted.
Soft Sugar Cookies
2 cups sugar
2 tablespoons baking powder
1 cup lard or shortening
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups buttermilk or sour milk
1 tablespoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
4-5 cups all-purpose flour
In a large bowl, add the sugar, baking powder, lard, lemon juice, eggs, vanilla, buttermilk, baking soda, and salt. Mix until smooth and light in color. Stir in enough of the flour to make a stiff dough. Use your hands to work flour in completely. Chill the dough for a few hours or overnight.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease cookie sheets and drop dough by teaspoonfuls, 2 inches apart. Bake for 10-12 minutes, until edges are golden brown, but center is still soft to the touch. Remove from oven and cool on pan for 5 minutes, then transfer to wire racks to cool.
Lovina Eicher is an Old Order Amish writer, cook, wife, and mother of eight. Readers can write to her at PO Box 1689, South Holland, IL 60473 (please include a self-addressed stamped envelope for a reply); or email LovinasAmishKitchen@MennoMedia.org and your message will be passed on to her.